But Wait, There’s More! Oneness—Expanded

Greetings! It’s been awhile since you heard from me. But my suddenly insistent Muse urged me to start writing posts here again. Probably because recent events in my life have expanded and deepened my view of Oneness.

As some of you know, Steve—my husband and partner-in-all-things for 40 years—died on Friday, February 16, 2024. In addition to other health issues, he suffered from a progressively debilitating neuro-muscular disease that even the Mayo Clinic Hospital in Phoenix could only roughly diagnose as a “form of CIDP” (chronic inflammatory demyelinating polyneuropathy)—an ALS-like condition, but not ALS (Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, commonly known as Lou Gehrig’s Disease). Steve’s quality of life had declined to next to nothing as he became unable to walk and was bedridden, could barely see due to macular degeneration, and even had to be hand fed when he began to lose the use of his arms and hands.

But he had an “out”: renal failure. By continuing or stopping hemodialysis he could choose to keep living or to die. He chose to stop dialysis, entered home Hospice, and died three weeks later.

As I write this it’s 11 weeks since he died. I’m still pretty much numb. My Path for the months preceding and the weeks since he died has been painful, stressful, challenging, frustrating, scary, a rollercoaster of extreme ups and downs, and almost intolerable levels of uncertainty.

But I’ve also experienced some heartening surprises, some “magical happenings,” and a TON of learning in many, MANY domains. It has expanded my view of Oneness to include not only aspects of living on this physical plane but also connections to the spirit plane. And it has deepened my perspective on some topics previously discussed here. I’d like to share some of this learning and these realizations with you because, at some point, we all experience the loss of a loved one.

Like my previous series of posts, this series will be posts about a variety of related topics from the practical to the spiritual, from the emotional to even the financial and legal—we do, after all, live on the physical plane that involves such necessary annoyances.

In all domains, I discovered there was A LOT I didn’t know and wasn’t prepared for:

• there’s a lot more to grief than Elisabeth Kubler-Ross’ clinical “5 stages of grief”
• there are even more vagaries, intricacies, benefits, and failings of our healthcare system and Hospice than I thought
• there are almost 40 legal, financial, and other “practical” To Do tasks that have to be dealt with after a spouse dies—even as one is drowning in grief
• there’s more to topics I previously discussed here, like Forgiveness

But, as with other life happenings I’ve experienced, I’ve also had the opportunity to be on the receiving end of great Kindness from others, which fills me with Gratitude—two topics that maybe deserve more exploration.

So I’ll be writing posts here on topics related to all of the above, and publishing the posts when guided by my Muse. So there probably won’t be a set schedule. But who knows.

I invite you to urge folks you think could benefit from this series to sign up by directing them to this website and the black box entitled “FOLLOW BLOG VIA EMAIL” on the right side of every page. Likewise, if you don’t see the benefit or are not ready or willing to explore this expanded view of Oneness, use Contact to unsubscribe.

If you do continue reading, I strongly urge you to leave comments sharing your experience or knowledge about any one topic. Although everyone’s understanding of Oneness varies, and their Path through end-of-life, Hospice, the grieving process, etc. is different, every little bit of information can help. It could be your act of Kindness for that day.😁

In closing, I need to tell you that Steve faced his end-of-life process with astounding courage, dignity, and grace. And his dry sense of humor and caring about other people were with him to the end. Interestingly, this former research physicist—a lifelong agnostic—had a kind of spiritual awakening at the end. He wrote about it two weeks before he died, and I posted what he wrote posthumously on his memoir blog. I invite you to read it at Steve’s Memoir.

So ‘nough said. Now, onto an exploration of an expanded and deepened view of Oneness!

P.S. From my first series of posts here you know of my interest in cool numbers. The number “1” is a significant number with many meanings: new beginnings, birth/rebirth, God or the Universe, Divine support, and moving into a new phase in life. Well I just realized this post’s publishing time and date all come down to 1’s: 5/6/2024 (5+6+2+2+4=19, 1+9=10=1) at 11:11 p.m. And I’m starting a new life that began 11 weeks ago when Steve died. Hey, I’ll take all the “1” energy I can get!

P.P.S. Even though saying he “passed” or “passed away” seems to be the politically correct terminology nowadays—and is actually in line with my spiritual beliefs that we simply move on to another plane—right now it feels like a euphemism that somehow minimizes my grief. So for the time being at least, I find myself using what feels to me to be the more harsh “he died” because that’s how this all feels to me. Maybe that will change with time.